1 post tagged “the beast”

The True iPhone Anti-Christ Is Here! Repent!

And I heard, as it were, the noise of thunder: One of the four beasts saying: "Come and see." And I saw. And behold, the definitive iPhone knock-off! 99%-exactly like the real thing except for the front and back cameras, and the sign of the Anti-Christ: the inverted Apple! Right after the iPod touch clone. Is this Alpha's and Omega's Kingdom come? Was Dr. Venkman right when he said we are headed for a disaster of biblical proportions, fire and brimstone coming down from the skies, rivers and seas boiling, 40 years of darkness, the dead rising from the grave, human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, and mass hysteria? Probably, as it runs Windows Mobile 6.0.

According to the manufacturers, this thing has Windows Mobile 6.0 built in, with:

TOUCH FLO smart operation interface and real-time sliding interface [what?] dynamic Screen technology (realize sensitive operation with distance, light and movement. Such as: auto cross screen when browsing web and watching movie/photo, auto shut down the screen light when phone closing to face after connection, etc.) Super large 3.2" touch LCD, built-in OFFICE softwares, real-time send/receive E-MAIL/MSN/QQ2007. Super E-map (can realize GPS satellite navigation with external GPS receiver). Unique memory card encryption technology to prevent information leakage!

All that with 128MB of ROM, 64MB of RAM, and a 200MHz TI OMAP850. And despite the cameras, the Anti-Christ also runs on EDGE/GPRS networks, not 3G, just like the JesusPhone. [Solomobi —Thanks Kennetic]

• APPLE,
• IPHONE,
• KNOCK-OFF,
• KNOCKOFF,
• THE BEAST,
• TOP